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Is Cottaging your big secret

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By *rankie0957  (M) 11 weeks ago

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I’m curious. For me cottaging is my big secret. It is personal to me. I have never ever discussed it with anyone else or shared experiences (except here hiding behind the anonymity). It has always been something I have done in my world, my escapism, my issues which drove me to be alone, lonely in dark and often dirty places, and from an early age. And continues to! I know others have cottaging friends, cruise together, discuss over a pint etc. but me, I’m alone in my pursuits.

How is it for others?

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*lut tvjess... By *lut tvjess...  (M) 11 weeks ago

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My name is jessica..ive been secretly dressing luke a lil cock bitch for over 5 yrs..no 1 knows that I dress up so slutty for cock it's my big secret..i cannot let any 1 know im a cock bitch..and i lv it..i lv dressing like a lil whore and have lots of sexy outfits..i always dress to impress and lv seein guys cocks throb when they see me

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By *uzyxd  (TV/TS/CD) 11 weeks ago

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My big secret definitely i dress for me I've met 2 lady's I've told my secret to and dressed for but would never let other people know

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*oredEric By *oredEric  (M) 10 weeks ago

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I'm heartily sick of hiding it all. I'm 54, I spent my youth confused and unhappy not understanding the feelings. I could talk to girls but didn't want to touch one, but my feelings towards boys back then were so taboo and dangerous I didn't know what to do.

As I got older and left school I went to college, I had several near misses with cute guys, I was chatting to them, it felt great and natural, I was happy and comfy around them, then my straight friends would panic over and save me from the "dangerous predatory gay". One poor lad got so badly warned off I ran after him, said I was sorry they'd done that to him, and I did want to go back to his room for a coffee, not even realising he probably had more in mind, but I wanted to go, he said I was too dangerous to know and walked off.

Back home I went out for a boozy night with friends, ended up back at my best friends house. We were in his room, he has this porn mag out, we were both shitfaced, and kneeling by the side of his bed looking at the magazine, it was a Private I recall, inside the back cover were little adverts for different things, in among them were some gay ads, he starts asking what do I think gays do together, I said the same as anyone else, kiss and cuddle and go from there except no female parts. He kept pressing, we were quite close, he kept pressing, so I said "Let's find out..." and leaned in and kissed him on the lips, for about 4.2 wonderful seconds he kissed me back, our tongues met, and then he sobered up so fucking quickly it was scary. He was angry and shouting and I beat a hasty retreat home crying, worried that he'd tell everyone, and I'd have been kicked the length and breadth of the city, being gay in Hull in 1984 or so was not easy.

He didn't thankfully, but I became scared of my own shadow. I was 20, stil a virgin because I had no interest in women, and men were too complicated and too scared to do anything.

So I hid from myself behind weight, who wants a fat cunt. Nobody, I threw myself into work, manly pursuits, anything to avoid my feelings.

When I was 25 I met a girl, but she was very tomboyish, so much so we went out, and secretly I was picking things for her to wear, and she was picking them for me. we went on for some time, sex was weird, we mostly had anal sex which I liked, the other I needed to go and wash quickly and stifle vomiting. But she had her issues, we split, she took up with another girl, I retreated back into my safety net of work and manly pursuits.

I was known as "the man's man", my friends imagined i lived this playboy life, their wives and girlfriends forbade them to associate with me because I was a bad influence and a womaniser, whereas in reality under my bike leathers I was in lingerie more ofter than not.

This lifestyle of denial and confusion went on until my best friend killed himself. It was very tragic, and it made me think, I was 35, I'd had all these feelings for years, I didn't want to die not knowing. It was the early days of the internet. So I arranged to meet a TV, after messing about one or two people I finally went through with it one Sunday morning. She came round, dressed, we chatted, we started kissing, and it was nice, actually it was really nice, and the groping was good, kissing down he body I found myself by a packed thong, I reached in and freed her from it, I'd never...my mind was awash with irrational fears about my mother walking in, the Pope and Dr Paisley walking in, a BBC camera crew, it being some giant Jeremy Beadle style wind-up, or being stricj dead by God on the spot, all that going on, but this cock in my hand, that felt really nice, so I kissed it. Which was good, so I licked it, which was really nice, and next thing I'm officially a cock sucker, and all of a sudden full or regret about not having done this years before, why had I denied myself this, it felt more natural than with a woman, I enjoyed it, she certainly was enjoying it. We had more fun until she had to leave.

Then the guilt kicked in. A couple of months later I met another really gorgeous TV, she was the single most depraved person I've met she was, still is I suspect, great. Much less guilt, plus we saw one another a few times. Another girl, next thing I'm dressing and I'm the bottom and then my world changed when she took me the first time. I dated a few TVs, and was finally becoming happy, but then I panicked, I felt pressured and compelled to do the family thing. next thing I know I'm in a registry office saying I do taking on a family.

To start with it was ok, she tolerated even enjoyed my dressing but increasingly I couldn't bear to touch her or be near her sexually, I fell ill, while struggling with that she started cheating, I knew but wouldn't face up to it. She tried to kill me once, three days in intensive care I pulled through. but the rot was terminal.

We split, I went into my shell again,and met another woman, she was better, but it still wasn't right, we didn't have sex much, which was a relief, but that ended when she re-joined a religious cult, seemingly so her kids could be abused. I abstained and went cold turkey on everything but work.

Work got out of hand, I worked mostly freelance, I started getting sacked for doing too much work, too quickly to too high a standard, under budget, ahead of time, the more they gave me the better I got. But the last one, tipped me over the edge, I went insane.

In 2014 I did something seriously stupid, I ended it, well i came bloody close. They gave me a choice, go of my own volition or be taken. i chose to go. When I left hospital a few month later it was explained to me I was effectively retired on health grounds. So now live quietly, while in hospital a certain Bank worked to rob me of everything, I ended up being evicted and losing my home, 23 years into a 25 year mortgage.

I was being looked after be social workers and a little house was found for me, I got a backdated payment from the DWP and got myself a pet for company.

I also decided when i was feeling stronger to make changes, I would dress because I want to and I enjoy it. Whether I look daft or not I don't care. Plus I'd start meeting people. and having fun, ideally looking to find someone special, almost impossible.

Mostly I've met men who are 15 minute cum and run merchants, they do my head in, see my profile for my rants on that. But I've also met nice people who've helped me come to terms with myself and let me enjoy sex guilt free, and helped me start to feel a little better about being me, I've lost a lot of weight, I am more confident when meeting people, and now the biggest change, I'm sick and tired of hiding from myself, of not being me.

I'm a cock sucking sissy faggot, I love being fucked, I love dressing and mincing about like a tart. I like cock I like being limp dick sissy with real men or other girls. I enjoy it. If anyone else doesn't like it, fuck em. I don't care anymore, so this is no longer my guilty secret, my guilty pleasure, it's me and it's what I want.

Also it turns out my biggest fear, my mother finding out, turns out she's always known. When the marriage was breaking up my ex wife threw it all in her face, my mother and sister burst out laughing, "after all the trannies he dated we were gobsmacked he married a woman, if you hadn't had kids already we'd have insisted on a test".

So that's it, from now on this is for me, I'll dress when I want, how I want, I'll see who I want when it's possible, and I'll enjoy it. If others don't like it, don't approve, are full of hate and ignorance, so what, that's their problem to deal with, I'm busy having fun and trying to be happy.

Apologies for the epic nature of this rant, I got into the flow and kept going. Maybe it might help others with how they feel, give you a good giggle, send you to sleep, or whatever else. That's your thing, this is mine.

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By *ouple07  (M) 10 weeks ago

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What a lovely human being you are,enjoy every moment of the rest of your life, you deserve it

Thinking of you

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*odSheffield By  *odSheffield    profile verified by photo premium paying member (M) 10 weeks ago

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Bless you. I suspect you have voiced the fears and feelings of hundreds on here. Thank you for being so brave and I wish you every happiness from the bottom of my heart. Enjoy your new found freedom - you deserve to. xx

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By *aura6949   profile verified by photo (TV/TS/CD) 10 weeks ago

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"I'm heartily sick of hiding it all. I'm 54, I spent my youth confused and unhappy not understanding the feelings. I could talk to girls but didn't want to touch one, but my feelings towards boys back then were so taboo and dangerous I didn't know what to do.

As I got older and left school I went to college, I had several near misses with cute guys, I was chatting to them, it felt great and natural, I was happy and comfy around them, then my straight friends would panic over and save me from the "dangerous predatory gay". One poor lad got so badly warned off I ran after him, said I was sorry they'd done that to him, and I did want to go back to his room for a coffee, not even realising he probably had more in mind, but I wanted to go, he said I was too dangerous to know and walked off.

Back home I went out for a boozy night with friends, ended up back at my best friends house. We were in his room, he has this porn mag out, we were both shitfaced, and kneeling by the side of his bed looking at the magazine, it was a Private I recall, inside the back cover were little adverts for different things, in among them were some gay ads, he starts asking what do I think gays do together, I said the same as anyone else, kiss and cuddle and go from there except no female parts. He kept pressing, we were quite close, he kept pressing, so I said "Let's find out..." and leaned in and kissed him on the lips, for about 4.2 wonderful seconds he kissed me back, our tongues met, and then he sobered up so fucking quickly it was scary. He was angry and shouting and I beat a hasty retreat home crying, worried that he'd tell everyone, and I'd have been kicked the length and breadth of the city, being gay in Hull in 1984 or so was not easy.

He didn't thankfully, but I became scared of my own shadow. I was 20, stil a virgin because I had no interest in women, and men were too complicated and too scared to do anything.

So I hid from myself behind weight, who wants a fat cunt. Nobody, I threw myself into work, manly pursuits, anything to avoid my feelings.

When I was 25 I met a girl, but she was very tomboyish, so much so we went out, and secretly I was picking things for her to wear, and she was picking them for me. we went on for some time, sex was weird, we mostly had anal sex which I liked, the other I needed to go and wash quickly and stifle vomiting. But she had her issues, we split, she took up with another girl, I retreated back into my safety net of work and manly pursuits.

I was known as "the man's man", my friends imagined i lived this playboy life, their wives and girlfriends forbade them to associate with me because I was a bad influence and a womaniser, whereas in reality under my bike leathers I was in lingerie more ofter than not.

This lifestyle of denial and confusion went on until my best friend killed himself. It was very tragic, and it made me think, I was 35, I'd had all these feelings for years, I didn't want to die not knowing. It was the early days of the internet. So I arranged to meet a TV, after messing about one or two people I finally went through with it one Sunday morning. She came round, dressed, we chatted, we started kissing, and it was nice, actually it was really nice, and the groping was good, kissing down he body I found myself by a packed thong, I reached in and freed her from it, I'd never...my mind was awash with irrational fears about my mother walking in, the Pope and Dr Paisley walking in, a BBC camera crew, it being some giant Jeremy Beadle style wind-up, or being stricj dead by God on the spot, all that going on, but this cock in my hand, that felt really nice, so I kissed it. Which was good, so I licked it, which was really nice, and next thing I'm officially a cock sucker, and all of a sudden full or regret about not having done this years before, why had I denied myself this, it felt more natural than with a woman, I enjoyed it, she certainly was enjoying it. We had more fun until she had to leave.

Then the guilt kicked in. A couple of months later I met another really gorgeous TV, she was the single most depraved person I've met she was, still is I suspect, great. Much less guilt, plus we saw one another a few times. Another girl, next thing I'm dressing and I'm the bottom and then my world changed when she took me the first time. I dated a few TVs, and was finally becoming happy, but then I panicked, I felt pressured and compelled to do the family thing. next thing I know I'm in a registry office saying I do taking on a family.

To start with it was ok, she tolerated even enjoyed my dressing but increasingly I couldn't bear to touch her or be near her sexually, I fell ill, while struggling with that she started cheating, I knew but wouldn't face up to it. She tried to kill me once, three days in intensive care I pulled through. but the rot was terminal.

We split, I went into my shell again,and met another woman, she was better, but it still wasn't right, we didn't have sex much, which was a relief, but that ended when she re-joined a religious cult, seemingly so her kids could be abused. I abstained and went cold turkey on everything but work.

Work got out of hand, I worked mostly freelance, I started getting sacked for doing too much work, too quickly to too high a standard, under budget, ahead of time, the more they gave me the better I got. But the last one, tipped me over the edge, I went insane.

In 2014 I did something seriously stupid, I ended it, well i came bloody close. They gave me a choice, go of my own volition or be taken. i chose to go. When I left hospital a few month later it was explained to me I was effectively retired on health grounds. So now live quietly, while in hospital a certain Bank worked to rob me of everything, I ended up being evicted and losing my home, 23 years into a 25 year mortgage.

I was being looked after be social workers and a little house was found for me, I got a backdated payment from the DWP and got myself a pet for company.

I also decided when i was feeling stronger to make changes, I would dress because I want to and I enjoy it. Whether I look daft or not I don't care. Plus I'd start meeting people. and having fun, ideally looking to find someone special, almost impossible.

Mostly I've met men who are 15 minute cum and run merchants, they do my head in, see my profile for my rants on that. But I've also met nice people who've helped me come to terms with myself and let me enjoy sex guilt free, and helped me start to feel a little better about being me, I've lost a lot of weight, I am more confident when meeting people, and now the biggest change, I'm sick and tired of hiding from myself, of not being me.

I'm a cock sucking sissy faggot, I love being fucked, I love dressing and mincing about like a tart. I like cock I like being limp dick sissy with real men or other girls. I enjoy it. If anyone else doesn't like it, fuck em. I don't care anymore, so this is no longer my guilty secret, my guilty pleasure, it's me and it's what I want.

Also it turns out my biggest fear, my mother finding out, turns out she's always known. When the marriage was breaking up my ex wife threw it all in her face, my mother and sister burst out laughing, "after all the trannies he dated we were gobsmacked he married a woman, if you hadn't had kids already we'd have insisted on a test".

So that's it, from now on this is for me, I'll dress when I want, how I want, I'll see who I want when it's possible, and I'll enjoy it. If others don't like it, don't approve, are full of hate and ignorance, so what, that's their problem to deal with, I'm busy having fun and trying to be happy.

Apologies for the epic nature of this rant, I got into the flow and kept going. Maybe it might help others with how they feel, give you a good giggle, send you to sleep, or whatever else. That's your thing, this is mine."

Read your post with tears in my eyes you are an inspiration to many.

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By *lack jones 67  (M) 10 weeks ago

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A very interesting and heartfelt read, from an intelligent man who, thank goodness, is now at peace with himself. Amen to that

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By *ing-monkey  (M) 10 weeks ago

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I'm a normal straight guy..my dark side is cottaging, canal paths, woods..anywhere there might be wanking and sucking activity..love the buzz of seeing if anyone is on the same wavelength as me in the toilets..or anywhere else outdoors..my other secret pleasure is wearing and sniffing knickers especially if I know the girl who had them on..secret stealer of underwear..done this since being a little boy

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By  *ingmaster1    profile verified by photo premium paying member (M) 10 weeks ago

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"A very interesting and heartfelt read, from an intelligent man who, thank goodness, is now at peace with himself. Amen to that"

i wish him all the best he deserves it

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By *lain51   profile verified by photo (M) 10 weeks ago

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My female friends know I am a sissy slut cock sucker and all tell me not to worry and enjoy myself. It's great to have friends who know what I do and think it is fine. I enjoy being out. No secrets, not like when I was young, confused and guilty.

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By *ean3591  (M) 10 weeks ago

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Best wishes to you BoredEric. Hope you have got your life back together and that you meet some worthwhile fellas who treat you properly.

Good luck

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By *ikkey69  (M) 10 weeks ago

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From a very early age I really enjoyed wanking and also being encouraged to wank older guys. As I grew up my interest in girls wasnt very high although I did love a nice pair or tits to wank to.

I met my present wife and about the same time started to be involved in cottaging on a daily basis, something i couldnt get enough of . I had no desire to get to her cunt , only her big tits and after leaving her everynight I couldnt wait to get to my fav cottage for my satisfaction. In the end after 4 years , one night she mafe me get her knickers off and insisted on being fucked.

Afterwards she was fine but to me My enjoyment was very little.

We married 2 yesrs later snd i really thought my feelings for cock would change and i,d be ok with cunt!!

God how wrong I was , within a week I was having cock in cottages. I felt very bad about not being true to her and kept saying I must be bi so of she didnt find out i was ok with it.

I dhagged her only 4 times in the first year which needless to say caused a lot of problems, heading to that she took a lover who gave her what she wanted, even though i didnt know!!

Later on i met an older guy and confessed my dilemma and he talked to me for hours where afterwards I was plainly obvious O was gay but wouldnt admit it.

After much thought I told my wife fearing the worst, and to my durprise she said she had always knew i preferred men sexually,and really didnt mind as she wanted me to be happy !!

I tell you now, it was like a ton weight off my shoulders and Ihave never been happier in my life. Now i see guys when i want and she encourages me to enjoy !! She told me about her having sex with loads of men since we married as she wanted cock to lol.

We are who we are , just be honest with ourselvse as we have only 1 life !!

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By *0gazza  (M) 10 weeks ago

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Also started cottaging at an early age but knew I was bi.

With society as it was, I got married and still am after some 30 years, still in love and sex still on the menu.

However, have never lost the thrill I got when cottaging and still look for unexpected encounters with guys

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By *rankie0957  (M) 10 weeks ago

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Wow what an extraordinary reply and life story from BoredEric and I hope you are now finding happiness. We all have our secrets of course and when I posted this thread I was hoping to understand why so many of us want to isolate ourselves in what are pretty horrible and dirty places, to find sex with strangers in cottages. And why even now at my age, happy in a relationship, happy with family and friends, I still want to have sex in a toilet?? F

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By *loudnine  (M) 10 weeks ago

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For all the supposed liberties we enjoy, there are still plenty of taboos around sex. Appealing as the attitude "I'm me, I'll be myself, fuck everyone else" sometimes is, in reality most of us have people we love and care about. Those people won't always be able to understand us, and in the context of relationships it can be a risk too far to shatter other people's worlds. So secrecy can become a boring necessity. Sometimes we hide things not for shame, but for love.

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By *uv2bsuckeddry  (M) 10 weeks ago

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I have kept my cottaging days a secret except for on here i started at a young age after watching a gay film on satelite tv where a gay man was sucking a man dry in his car. It made my cock go rock hard hearing the guy groaning as he was being sucked dry. So i decided to go to my local park where i knew gays hung out looking for sex. As soon as i walked along the path in the park i noticed an older man following me i sat on a bench he came upto me and said hi .he must of noticed the bulge in my jeans because he then said looks like u have a nice cock. I said do you want to see. He said come in the bushes with me so i did. He undone my flies and my cock popped out rock hard he said wow then he put his lips around my hard cock it felt amazing and started to deepthroat my cock i was trembling all over with the sensations i then felt my self about to shoot my load he sucked faster untill i pumped every drop down his throat. My legs went to jelly it was out of this world. Since that day i used glory holes in public toilets. He turned me bi that day. Just love spunking down mens throats and i still am to this day. So if any one is local to leiston suffolk and u want me to spunk down yur throat anytime in yur cars pm me plz

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By *aravaggio  (M) 10 weeks ago

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I thought this thread was supposed to be about cottaging?? …

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By *uv2bsuckeddry  (M) 10 weeks ago

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It was about cottaging i sqid in my post after that time wen the older man sucked me dry in bushes in a park i then used cottages on a regular basis

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By *rankie0957  (M) 10 weeks ago

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The thread is about cottaging and why we do it. It is not about secrets generally or about cottaging experiences. It’s about why we do it when it is such a lonely isolating and let’s face it shameful act - so much so that we keep it from everyone we know.....

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By *addyTopB21  (M) 10 weeks ago

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When I was young it was my way of meeting other men and it was secret but by my late thirties those people who knew I was gay usually knew I also cootaged. Sadly the days of cottaging in my area are virtually gone and so are the glory holes. That's so called development. Cottaging could be lonely but I also made some mates, had lots of fun and experiences in the UK and abroad.

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By *loudnine  (M) 10 weeks ago

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"The thread is about cottaging and why we do it. It is not about secrets generally or about cottaging experiences. It’s about why we do it when it is such a lonely isolating and let’s face it shameful act - so much so that we keep it from everyone we know....."

This is your opinion reflecting your experience, but if you read the posts you'll see not everyone sees it in the same light as you do. That's the point of forums.

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By *ormat  (M) 10 weeks ago

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I've never told anyone about my cottaging except on here. There are other sorts of MM sex that I'd probably prefer, but cottaging is the easiest. Being married and retired means that I don't run around much w/o the wife knowing where I am and when I'll be back. Makes dirty afternoons a bit difficult!

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By *aravaggio  (M) 10 weeks ago

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Cottaging, to me, is like condensed cruising … … I can't explain it in any other way. Its more thrilling, being in a very small place where, with luck, other like minded people will visit. Whereas with cruising, you may have to wander round several spots within the area, here, in this public toilet, sex will definitely take place sooner or later. That first sight of someone taking longer than they should at the urinal. The slight turn towards you, so you are aware of the slow wanking of a semi erect penis, the reciprocal action, then the full turn and offer of a helping hand, quickly followed by a greedy warm mouth. You may be lucky, and a nod towards a cubicle, which usually signals bum play aswell …….. is very addictive ….

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By *earnelg  (M) 10 weeks ago

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Great days in a local park cottage when I was a young lad.

The word got around that I was very willing.

I sucked them they sucked me, all on my way home.

Loved the excitement of hearing guys come up to the entrance of the loo, who would it be, old fella, young fella a lad?

At night it was great fun, the light bulbs would regularly be removed and it was total darkness, hands and cocks everywhere I loved it, once they knew I was a young one I was totally mauled. had to make excuses to get out at night, had to say was going to see a mate. Happy days.

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By *annos   profile verified by photo (M) 10 weeks ago

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It's where I had my first and many happy times as a young lad! Most are closed now sadly.

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By *aul2102  (M) 10 weeks ago

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I used to have a selection of the A to Z maps in my car because they used to have the toilet symbols in, it was a small triangle with a T in it.. had lots of fun travelling around to them lol

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By  *art69    profile verified by photo premium paying member (M) 7 weeks ago

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Oh boy, the good old days! Innocent man fun, no harm done to anyone!

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By *perm nurse   profile verified by photo (M) 6 weeks ago

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Loved cottaging espevially in a dress such a thrill

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